Appetite!

Duh...! A couple of days ago the doorman at the library caught me at the entrance and forbade me to go inside because of an empty cup and a donut I brought along inside my library basket. “Kein Becher und kein Essen,” he said firmly. I was indeed planning to use the cup for drinking later on. So I tempted to see how far my luck could go and started to say, “Oh, but it’s empty…,” but then abruptly change my mind after I saw the cold expression on his face “… heuheu… ok, ok, I’ll throw the cup away.” So I threw it in the bin and came back to him, putting the sweetest smile I could make and said, “I will not eat the donut (honestly!).” He looked at me straight in the eyes and with the chill voice replied, “Das ist mir egal, Sie dürfen es NICHT mitbringen!” Hiks… he’s not the man I should try to argue with.

So that was 2 days ago. Today, the girl sitting in front of me chewed her apple noisily. The fact that she’s better in smuggling the food had made her munching sounded extremely louder, which hurt my ears and almost brought me to tears.

Nah… lets bend the topic a little bit.

Tonight I’ll go to a dinner invitation with my usual dinner mates. These are the closest friends I found from my prior master project. Even after the project has ended, we still meet each other once in a while. We mostly have the not-so-rich-student-hang-out-style, where each of us should bring something and share, so that we would have a lot to eat and drink at the dinner. But some of these friends have their own eating rules, which at first always made me confused thinking of what kind of food I shall bring.

One of them is a vegetarian without fish, one is vegetarian with fish, and one can only eat chicken meat and hates all the other meats. These 3 people including me and one other friend REALLY love hot and spicy food. On the other hand, another two friends cannot eat spicy food at all, but they eat (almost) all kind of food. From all these people, five are into Asian food, one is willing to taste the Asian food, and the other is so-so.

After a while, I decided to always bring vegetarian food to the dinner. Sometimes a bit spicy, sometimes just normal food.

And then some months ago this gorgeous guy starts to join into my network. The first time I invited him to my place, I cooked chicken mushroom. It was a bit of a failure since I dropped too much broth powder and it was super salty. But he said it was OK, so I didn't care anymore.

Days after that I made him confess that he actually doesn't like mushroom nor chicken at all. Hahaha… still wonder how he managed to eat what I served at that time. I granted him "Gentleman of the Month" for his big effort. But he also deserves "the Pickiest Guy I Knew" for his strictly limited choice of food. (^^ popcorn if you read this.. :# lol...)

When I finally wanted to let him meet my dinner mates, the confusion struck back. This guy puts ground meat on his every meal. He claimed that he only likes German food, but thank God he actually loves Asian fried rice too. So even though in conclusion I can make fried rice for everybody, it still is not the best solution. Vegetarian fried rice = less satisfaction for the gorgeous guy. Ground meat fried rice = no satisfaction for the vegetarian and the no-meat-unless-chicken mates.

I'm still digging my brain to find what other Asian food I can cook that would fulfill everybody's appetite.

PS: Best greetings to those who think dinner brings happiness ^^

Jellyfish

Last night I had a terrible nightmare about one of my best friend in high school. In my dream I was looking into her picture and thought, “oh, it’s been such a long time since the last time I saw her.” Then suddenly the picture talked to me, “the doctor only cut my right hand. I still have the left hand.” I was like, “geez... it’s true, I don't see her right hand in the picture.” Then still in my dream I made a conclusion, that she suffered from bone cancer, just like her mother who had one of her arm amputated and even so still passed away (which is true in the real life).

I was still in a trance when the memory came to me. That’s why I can still remember the dream vividly. And after I fully woke up my mind continued wondering on extended thoughts.

It must be unimaginably frightening to be in a situation where someone tells you that part of your body should be amputated.
Just recently I heard some news about a friend who is also suffering from a cancer on his head. Then I thought… (even though I know how stupid and heartless it is, but still it came to my mind) maybe it’s better to have the head amputated because then without the brain, one cannot feel the fear and the sorrow in his heart anymore.
Ahh, OK...OK… this is such an extreme and illogical thinking.
But I just want to blurt out my perplexed mind of a weird connection between brain and heart in creating and sensing the emotions.
I mean, we can really sense an actual painful squeeze at heart when we're in despair, or find it hard to breath for an expanding heart when we're too excited. Right? Though without brain as the mastermind, heart won't be able to get in touch with emotion; still people associate emotion with the heart and not with the brain: "broken heart", "lighthearted", "hati yang berbunga-bunga", "sakit hati", "herzschmerz"*, "herzblatt"*, etc. etc.

You might be puzzled on how I link amputation with brain and heart? Well pardon me for having a jumping mind.

Coincidentally I saw a video this evening, telling me that jellyfish does not have a brain.
A man in the video said, how unfortunate it is to be a jellyfish. Happiness and sadness would never be a matter for jellyfish because it can't feel such emotion anyway. It's just simply a loss for never be able to know what happiness is.
On the contrary, the girl in the video said, how fortunate it is to be a jellyfish. It's just simply a bless for never be able to know what sadness is.

I wish I could always stay in this position, where I agree with the man, that jellyfish is so unfortunate. Because then I know, and will always know what happiness is.

*thanks, popcorn ^^

Dizzy

It all swirls around my head. These old pictures and new pictures. These pictures swirl around my head. I can’t see any of them clearly. Even sometimes they would take turn and stop in front of my eyes for some seconds, but those seconds were just too fast. I still can’t see them clearly.
Some just never stop moving, never give me a chance to examine them. The other just never stop anymore. Maybe they got tired. Maybe they already moved forward and make another swirl around someone else's head.

I don’t know. Maybe if I just take one random picture and put it in an album, just like some people did, it would probably stay in there for a long time. But the probability of me rip it away after that, or it slip out of the album is much bigger. Definitely.

There is one picture in fact, that stays around for 2 years already. Always take its time to sway slowly in front of me. But I always ignore, never take it seriously. Why swaying anyway, why not stay very still instead? That’s what I keep having in mind. But its patient to keep swaying for 2 years awes me indeed. However I know this picture will never fit into my album.

hmmm.......

Talking about a Dream

I wish I could have a Polaroid camera installed in my head, so that I can easily push the button whenever I have a good dream in my sleep. It’s too bad that when I wake up from a dream, I will still be able to remember what it was about for some seconds, but then it suddenly disappears without a trace in the next second.

If you ask why Polaroid camera instead of digital video camera: nah… in my point of view, Polaroid camera would be the most appropriate tool that can make a dream remain as much possible as a dream. No repository; dreamy colors; printed in patches, which will make it stay as mysterious as it is as you try to solve the puzzle and the meaning behind. Got confused by this explanation? Don’t worry, I’m no less confused…

But I do remember some of my dreams. Though these sticky ones are usually the kind of nightmares full of terrors. Most of them are about chasing. Either I chase some people or I am the one who’s being chased and in hidings. Sometimes I dream the same dream over and over again. I dreamed about my childhood house and high school several times, even though some locations were unreal. Some dreams are like déjà vu, where I would tell myself inside the dream, “I think I’ve been here before, I knew this would have happened!” or during a bad nightmare, “Wake up, wake up, it’s just a dream.”

When I was a child I sleeptalked a couple of times. I know ‘cos my mom said so and I woke up one time still laughing so hard. I don’t know whether I still do it until now, but I don’t think so. Never had a terrifying or a hilarious dream for a long time now (the only way that caused me sleeptalking). Maybe it’s because I don’t have any unconscious anxiety in my mind nor that I run into a super funny conversation with friends lately. A bit sad for the last part. I can’t remember when was the last time I laugh until my stomach hurt.
Instead, I’m having such a terrible stomachache since the morning. That’s why mama said not to put just any trash into your stomach. Huhuhu…

the Victims of Love

Let's play this number from Hugh Grant and Haley Bennet first before you continue reading.
Way back into Love 


Today I chatted with a friend. Somehow we stumbled talking about romance; about his crush on his classmate and my own long lost crush. The conversation itself was funny. I found my new talent on giving foolish advises and developing a love philosophy. "It's like looking at the menu in a luxurious french restaurant, where they offer a looooooong list of food, and none that I understand. So can't pick out anything. Wasting time seeing and studying all of the menu and in the end decide that the price are too expensive," so I told him, reflecting our journey in seeking a true love. I think I was inspired by someone in a movie. Otherwise I won't be able to say that kind of poetic sentence, lol...

Talking about love betrayal, it's my second time now to hear a story about someone whose partner had been snatched by his/her own best friend. It's definitely a heart-ripping experience to anyone who has been betrayed in such way, not only by his lover, but also by his closest friend. Whom else can he put his trust on then? And these two friends of mine, the victims of love, had built their relationship for years.
Could there be any excuse for the "enemy in the blanket"? Perhaps, the traitors also had some struggle inside their heart while they were doing what they did. What if they also suffered in the past, trying to suppress their forbidden feelings. Who knows if they were really made for each other, and not for my friends... Who knows...

However, it is still something unforgivable for my friends. Hope they won't kick my ass if they read this consideration. Yeah, it's so easy to talk. If it happens to me, I most likely won't be able to let go also.

What Will Happen Then

When I was young and unripe
I met this old guy, wise yet talked too much
Nagging on my habits
Breaking my poor eardrums
When I was about to leave him he said to me

Life always brings unexpected things
You need to take every turn on the street
Or else you’ll never see
What it has behind the corner
When you take the turn you might wonder
What will you find, what will happen then
Just take a chance and see
What the destiny brings you

When I was all by myself
Wondering where my soul mate is hiding
Many have come and gone
None suits my completion
When I was about to give up I said to me

Life always brings unexpected things
I need to take every turn on the street
Or else I’ll never see
What it has behind the corner
And when I see a turn, I wonder
Whom will I find, what will happen then
Just take a chance and see
Whom the destiny brings me

When I saw him in despair
Thinking hard how he can turn back the time
Dreams have been piled so high
None has ever came true
When he was about to break down I said to him

Life always brings unexpected things
You need to take every turn on the street
Or else you’ll never see
What it has behind the corner
And when you take a turn, you wonder
Where will it end, what will happen then
Just take a chance and see
Where the destiny brings you

My Mac enjoyed a sunbathing,

but I rescued it, before it gets any sunburn.

Oh well, oh well. This story below will have nothing to do with my dearly Mac.
And no, it has nothing to do with the windy-sunny-rainy-undetermined spring either.

It will only contain lots of sighs.

Tired of working on the project. Had a small quarrel with my working partner again this afternoon and feeling so damn sleepy now.
Met the goat at night, who did a little something before he parted, that made the others had sudden sore throats.
Shooed the monkey from my room last night and gave a little heart attack to the donkey after that.
Uh oh... too much things happened in 2 days. I don't know what I'm rambling about.

I wonder where my sunshine has been

The first day I arrived in Bremen, I didn’t have my semester ticket yet. So I just decided to stroll on the street, looking for the nearest supermarket to my new home. I picked the wrong turn and got lost. No wonder, I have a really bad orientation. But thanks to that, it brought me to 3 wonderful people, who gave me an instant good impression of Bremen.

That day, tired of going without a clear destination, I stopped a middle-aged couple who were walking hand-in-hand, asking for help of where I can find the nearest Supermarket. I was a bit surprised because they turned out to be very friendly. Well, some friends already told me that the Germans in the north are much warmer than those in the south. But only after I met that couple I started to believe in what I heard. We had a small conversation and before we parted they wished me a good living in Bremen. I was so happy because of that.
And now, if I take a look on some parts of my life, I can see that their wish has came true :D

I continued on walking as they directed. After some minutes I started to have doubts again. Then there was this young guy walking through the sidewalks with white earphones (iPod? OK, not important!) on each side of his head. He walked in a bouncy way, looked so happy to me. ‘Cos he was the only one I could see on that street, I decided to ask for his advise.
He talked like the advertisement salesmen on DRTV (those who talk soooo incredibly fast like they never take time to breath or swallow their spit). Have you ever seen Nigahiga on Youtube promoting his Big Bouncing Inflatable Green Ball? Well, this young guy talked almost as fast and in a cheerful manner.
He had a very bright aura around him and I was enchanted by his super big fascinating smile. Oh no no no no…. this is not love at first sight! Not at all! He is just a teenager after all. But I loved his charming smile and personality.

Day goes by and month changes. I met him for the third time (I forgot when/where/how we met on the second time, but I’m sure it was the third time). He was again with his white earphones, stepping into the crowded tram where I was in. I was so tired and moody that day, and I couldn’t get a sit so I became even more moody. But as I saw him (he was surprisingly smiling, even though I don’t know to whom), it felt like the sun has finally arrived.
When I wanted to press the stop button on the handlebar, I couldn’t, because his hand was covering it. Then he pressed the button for me and spread that enchanting smile again, hehehe…… I couldn’t stop smiling for the rest of the day. He was my sunshine.

It’s been 3 or 4 months since the last time I met him. Wonder where he has been. I kinda miss my sunshine.

Feeling Warm at Heart

I think I’m having one of the best parts of my life in the last one-third year of 2009. Especially talking about my life in Germany. These happy days are still continuing until today, dreamfully for good.

I’m so grateful that I’m surrounded by so many good friends and I’m so thankful that I think I am loved or at least cared about. Never in other town in Germany I found so many nice people that I can count as my best friends, the ones that connect so well with me, since I’m not the kind of person who can easily feel close to many people. My father even told me that I’m cold. I think it’s true :p Though this doesn’t mean that I’m not friendly, hehe…

I will never regret that I come to this city. It might be one of my biggest luck. My friends in class are mostly great and my Indonesian friends are incredibly awesome.

So, thank you friends for being my friends ♥

A Stupid Apartment Life: Fire and Heart Attack

About a month after I moved into this student apartment, the fire alarm rang so loud around 2 o’clock at dawn. I was just in the beginning of my sweet adventure in the land of goose feather pillows, which suddenly changed into an ear-breaking thumping nightmare. I thought I falsely set my alarm clock and began to curse on myself before I realized that it was actually the fire alarm, the first one I’ve heard in my life, EVER! Then my heart started to race so fast and I moved around the house trying to figure out what I should do first. I collected my passport, wallet and cell-phone, then counted whether I should necessarily bring everything I could put into my small backpack or not.
I waited stiffly for somebody rushing up in the corridor or for some noises from the people hurrying out of the building, but it was very silent. I counted to ten, still nothing happened outside my door. “Damn, are these people sleeping like corpses or are they dead already?” I thought to myself. Finally I heard a door swung opened and I peeked through the peeping hole. A guy, all dressed up, walked towards the staircase. So I started telling my stupid self again, smart guy gets dress up first before going out into the cold winter snowy night. So I quickly grab my pair of jeans and jacket and rushed out.
Huh…? It was so deserted outside. Not quite like what I’d imagined before, where people got scared and clumped tied together. I found no more than 5 people down there, some just raised their heads from the balconies and they all looked super relax. Oh, so this is how civilized people face disaster: stay very calm, I thought to myself again.
The alarm stopped ringing, I saw no firefighter, everybody went back inside, so did I. The end of the loud night, but I could hardly get back to sleep again.

About a month after that, the fire alarm rang again on 6 o’clock in the morning and I had to force my eyes open. This time I was smarter. I dressed up first and took my important belongings with me before calmly walked outside. Then 2 months after that the damn alarm rang again. I started to get frustrated and swore at the idiot person, whoever he was, for smoking in the building or playing prank or practicing the fire evacuation exercise or whatever the hell it was.
On the fourth time, I made friends with a neighbor girl who speaks 7 languages on our way out in the emergency staircase and waved a happy-good-morning greeting to two friendly firefighters. Somebody told me afterward, that those were all false alarms because the system was broken. Not so related, but I also then heard a creepy true story about a murder happened in this building some years ago.

Today, around 6.30pm I smelled something burning in my room. I thought maybe a neighbor overcooked his food. I was putting on some facial masker when the fire alarm started to ring. Oh, noooo……. After a long peaceful living period in the building, please don’t give me any false alarm again, so I thought. I was going to take shower when I remembered something. Huh, wasn’t it smoke that I smelled? Heck this time it’s for REAL!!! Now there’s no more relaxation session before going outside (Oh, btw, it’s wintertime again. I find out that the alarm only chooses wintertime to ring). I still pondered about taking my computer out with me or not. But I didn’t want to look so damn panicked that I bring all my stuff with me when nothing actually happens. So I decided to only turn off the music and take a sip of hot tea I just brewed and go out. Oww, there were slight smokes in the corridor, I started to shiver. This is real… this is real…
I met a friend outside, so I was pretty happy. I haven’t seen him for quite a time anyway and it had to be the right time to meet again. We witnessed how the smokes reeked from the top floor (where he lives). I was freezing even though I wore 2 jackets. He was worse. It was his first alarm experience, so he just jumped out of his room wearing only slippers. Hahaha… evil me laughed on him.
I prayed a bit for the sake of my new computer and my other stuffs that I love so much. Then I suddenly remember about my limp neighbor. I didn’t see him peeking out from his balcony. But his room was dark, so I guess he was somewhere save in vacation. Then I realized I couldn’t be that selfish and started to wish for everybody’s safety.

Thanks to the 4 fire trucks, a number of overly calm firefighters (I almost accused them for lounging), some policemen and paramedics, we had a happy-ending night.

Still, I can’t think of anything good about living in a high building. I should finish writing about my earthquake experience while I was on the 17th floor of a skyscraper during my vacation in Indonesia.

Coincidence so Sweet... :D

How many times did I run into him today? 4! Huhuhu... can't stop myself from grinning. He's the neighbor I bump into the most often, I guess; and almost all the time it took place at the washing room. I should wash more often then, hahaha....
We both had trouble with the washing machine before and today another funny thing happened again. A funny conspiracy, 2 shameful stares at each other (because we got caught on the spot while doing this "washing mischief") and 2 silly giggles. We really should make more coincidence meetings. It seems to be fun.
Well well... at least now I know he studies history. Dude, what shall I name him now? A history guy or a laundry guy?!?

Ah! Nervosity...

The free time I have now makes me nervous, because I know that I’m not that free. But why it’s so hard to get my lazy ass to work?!

The coming Christmas makes me nervous. Where will I spent my holiday, with my friends here, or with my family there? Why there’s no special cheap train ticket offer yet?! I'm going bankrupt soon... :(

Mafia Wars on Facebook makes me nervous. Why the Energy points raise so incredibly slow?! And that damn mafia killed me, and I can’t get revenge (yet). Arrrgh..!

The fact that I’m still devoted to computer games makes me nervous. How old am I now?! Nah… age is just a number, they said. I’m still a child at heart.

The snow is coming soon. I can’t wait to call my photographer troops to go hunting and see the new season scenery, but I hate to have frozen hands under the gloves. What will I do?!

I can’t stop thinking about food lately. Why?!

I can’t stop shaking my foot. Ah! Nervosity…

Day of Contemplation

Wow… so many things happened today.

I think the yesterday might seem so far away for some people. I really had a great time last night with some of my friends, just like some days before. Well, it’s been a very good week for me, even though I have a couple of sleepless nights since 2 days ago. So I fell asleep in the bus on my way to uni and then fell asleep in the class as well. For me, the worst part of the day was just that.

Then in the afternoon my friend, the one who was in the same party with me the other night came; and just like we planned in the morning, she brought her stuffs to spend the night at my place. I was a bit surprised when she said it was for the sake of our work in the project. ‘Cos she’s not usually that diligent, hehehe… I already suspected that something had happened and when she arrived I knew I was right. But she won't tell me what it was. Some hours after that, slowly but sure, the story flowed… I don't know how to comfort people or how to stop tears. So I just went silent.

Soon after that the sad girl fell asleep, maybe she got tired of all these things burdening her mind. So I continued with my work and checked the email. Another surprise came. Someone got mad at someone else and all of us happened to worked in one group before. This mad someone sent the email to everybody, who were involved and linked to the case. It's like watching a soap opera. Pretty sad but somewhat hilarious. You know, like you are offered to see people fighting in public and it makes you curious about what will happen after this, how the actors are going to react and being tensed up to see the climax. I know it's very bad of me to become exited of someone else's shame. I feel guilty for that. When the sad girl woke up, I showed her the email. She was a bit amused.

I feel sorry for the guy who was accused and being humiliated in the email. He always had problems with the professors and this email which was forwarded to them will just worsen his position. I find the accusation was harsh, but at the same time I admire the angry girl because she can always speak what's in her mind and stand up for what she believes is true, even though she always express it in an ignoble way. She's also loyal to people whom she likes and she thinks are good and dedicated to their work. So I want to have the positive sides of her too and stay away from the rude behavior, 'cos I still wanna be loved by everybody :)

Untitled Memory

You stand in the middle of the road
Your feet are on the border
Of the future and the past
Knowing you can’t go back
But too scared to step forward

When you look up facing the dark night
The snow starts to fall down
Like blur memories from the past

No matter how you wish upon the falling stars
Your wishes would never come true
Now the million stars glittering in the sky
Are just the reflections of your spilled tear drops
The time has arrived
When you have to let it all go

Tears of happiness and tears of pain
Are now blended together
As you grasp all those memories
Hold them tight near to your heart
Knowing they will keep you alive
Remind you of what makes you who you are

And you get your strength as you try to smile
Now as you look up
The snow and the stars seem so beautiful
Beautiful enough to heal your broken heart

a Broken Washing Machine and a Broken TV Bring Out Beautiful Outcomes

How many times did you run into trouble when using the washing vending machines? Well, I got lots of troubles using them. Is it just those machines in the students’ dormitories that always work improperly or most of the vending machines are like that? I feel like I come from the Flintstones era whenever I use the stupid machine (or is it me who's being stupid? Or maybe I just had bad lucks?). Tsk… today I lost 1€ and the machine refused to work. Before this, I experienced the faded colors, the machine stopped working even though the work was not done yet because I didn’t put enough coins, so I regretfully had to take the laundry out and let the water that was left in the machine flowed to the floor. Uh oh, I felt sorry for the Hausmeister who had to clean it up :p. No need to mention what kind of other problems I bumped into in the past, you must have experienced at least one of them too.

Ah… but forget about the bad luck. The sun always shines after a rainy day. After I lost 1€, I got my hand full explaining to a cute guy who came in after me and wanted to use the same defect-metal-box.
And if I remind myself of what happened yesterday… I shouldn’t complain about losing the tiny amount of money. ‘Cos I got a television for freeeeee!!! Yay!!! Thanks to Z who found it outside my room and told me to take it in. It’s like someone sent me a TV from heaven to replace my old TV that got broken during the delivery when I was moving into this room. And I kept that broken TV for a long time ‘cos I didn’t have the heart to throw it away. At least not before I found its successor. So I finally set it free yesterday. Sure, I took its last picture standing alone in the empty hallway... for the sake of memento.

Just Another Ordinary Day

Today:
I lazily get off the bed with heavy eyes. The alarm clock had already given up shouting after the 4th snooze. I only slept for 5 to 6 hours every night in the last two weeks. Sometimes less when I couldn’t shut down my stubborn brain even after 3 o’clock in the morning.

Today:
I had a fight with my best friend. The first frontal fight after we’ve become friends for about a year. Part of it was my fault. I was too harsh and very impatient because I was sure that I was right and I was tired of arguing about simple things that became big. My words had offended her, so I said sorry. Then I went to the bathroom. Obviously I didn’t only release the regular stuff, but also released the tense in my brain. So I felt very light hearted after that and I just wanted to laugh at our stupid fight. But she was still hot, couldn’t even give a bitter smile. Anyway, after some time she cooled down too and we talked like normal again.
Maybe what happened today will bond us stronger.

Today:
My professors told me that the team definitely needs me in the project. I was really good in some tasks and they really gave me some supportive words. I was happy. It went quite well and short.

Today:
I remember, one week left before I fly to home. The luggage is still unpacked. The souvenirs for the relatives still have to be bought. What do they like? What do they need? Why are those stuffs so expensive? Is it enough for everybody? There are still no candies for the kids. Oh no….!

Today:
One of my friend is on his flight, flying back home for good. Maybe we won’t see each other again, maybe we will. Who knows…

Today:
I want to jump into bed earlier. But I still have this damn report to finish. Aaaah….. give me a break!

Today was so different from yesterday. Even though both are just ordinary days, but no day is really that ordinary. I wonder what tomorrow will bring.

Good night now.

Why I should met him today?!

I had such a bad mood today and as if there always has to be a climax on each doomed days, I met a very strange guy on my way home after shopping. At first I didn’t notice the guy who sits behind me on the tram (we were the last passengers). I walked in front of him and knew right away that he also lives in my building. Then he sped up his steps to catch up with me and said hello. I answered with a broad smile as I was thinking, oh good, another conversation with someone from the building. You know, people barely know each other in my apartment and they never say a word other than “hallo” and “ciao” when they meet in the elevator (mostly without even looking at the people they speak to). I know I could just break the ice if I want to, but I don’t even care to make friends with them. Yes.... I'm guilty too!

OK, back to this guy (who was his name? I forgot). So, I turned to him with a big smile which slowly faded away as I remembered that I saw him before and then realized who he is: the guy who lives one door to the right in front of me and happen to be the neighbor I hate MOST!!! Well, the only neighbor that I hate, to be precise.
He is the one who always goes to the emergency staircase right in front of my balcony whenever he needs to yell at someone in his cell phone. Can you imagine, I was studying or enjoying my favorite drama show or simply chillaxing in a beautiful Sunday afternoon with the balcony door opened to get some fresh air when suddenly I heard this annoying guy yelling and cracking non-stop for at least 15 minutes each times.
I always wonder why he always has to go to that staircase when he wants to yell, while everybody in this building has their own balcony. Why didn’t he go to his own balcony?

Maybe I was being really patient, that I waited until the third time he did that again, I went outside and told him to go away. Without even care to stop yelling at his poor enemy on the other end of the phone, or take a single breath, he made a very offensive body language to shut me up. So, instead of regaining my peaceful day back, I became even more boiled. Unable to think clearly to strike him back, I closed the door with a loud bang and tried to calm myself down.

Today he said he was surprised that I’ve already become his neighbor for about a year. He never saw me all this time. I silently said to myself, "Aha…! Maybe I put such an evil face that day when I confronted him, so he couldn’t recognize my original angel face today."
Further he asked about my age and gave me the – REALLY? You look so young – crap and suddenly pinched my cheek. I was stunned, couldn’t find a word to say and only managed to rub my cheek clean in front of him.
Why does my brain always work so slowly whenever I need to fight with someone?

Finally he said we should meet again. Oh yeah…! Dare to knock on my door, you are soooo gonna die.
--- Well, maybe not. I don’t have enough guts to punch him. My two excuses: he is almost two heads taller than me and……. I just have no guts!

PS: annoying neighbors could be the next interesting topic. My sister always has some bad luck with the neighbors. Or maybe another interesting topic: Have you ever met a “psycho”?

Behind "Liam and Fluffy"

The story bellow, “Liam and Fluffy”, was originally created on Thursday, April 10, 2008, but then edited and published last night, August 1, 2009. Oh…. almost 1.5 year after it was first written.

I asked a friend who happened to be online that day and was chatting with me, for an inspiration regarding the characters’ names, because I was not satisfied with my own ideas. They were Helly the dog and Bombi the lioness. I then finally took the name Liam for the dog after searching in internet. It means a determined guardian. And I took the name Fluffy for the lioness after my friend’s suggestion.

This short story is actually part of a “novel” that I wanted to write two years ago, but I never finish it. I then started with another story and didn’t finish it either. For those two fictions, I’ve already known the beginning and the end of the stories, but I got stuck in the middle part because lack of ideas. Other than that, my writing skill sucks….

Oooh… since I mentioned that “Liam and Fluffy” was part of my prior novel-on-work, I want to make it clear though, that it wasn’t about children story at all. It was about a young teenage girl, full of hatred, contented to take revenge on her own father and drew a plan to get rid of her step mother. The draft was ended tragically with her soul mate’s death and her own suicide. My sister and brother-in-law laughed so hard at me when I told them about this novel where all the characters die.

After I reread the whole pages all over again until the day changes, I decided that I hate the general idea of the story, even though I like how it ends. No, I’m not depressed and I wasn’t depressed when I wrote it. I don’t know why, I ’m just so into a sad ending story, either it is in a film or in a book. But who knows, it might just my way to escape from the blues.
OK, maybe this is the two sides of me who loves to laugh and to be sentimental at times.

Hmm… I think I’ll just abandon my first novel. Perhaps I’ll continue with the other one. I like the story better. It was about friendship, but again, of course it was also ended in tragedy. Let’s see… maybe it would change. Hope I have time and inspiration to write again.

Liam and Fluffy

One day, Liam a shepherd dog was taking a stroll when he started to hear a heartbreaking groan from somewhere in the woods near to the barn where he lives with an old farmer. Fluffy, a lioness, got enmeshed in a trap built by the farmer and Liam just happened to be there and became the first one to find Fluffy.

Fluffy pleaded Liam to help her get out of the trap. She convinced Liam that she was a trustful kindhearted lioness, she wasn’t the one who ate the farmer’s chickens and she had never harmed nor annoyed the farmer’s family.

Liam looked deep into Fluffy’s clear big eyes to see if she was being genuine with all she had said but suddenly got enchanted by her beautiful glance. He instantly believed in Fluffy’s words, and then for 2 days long he struggled, biting the net that trapped Fluffy inside. He guarded Fluffy at night and never rested from biting even though his jaw was already worn out. His only wish and intention was to send Fluffy to freedom as soon as possible.

When the hole was big enough, Fluffy stepped out of the trap. Liam tried to take Fluffy to his home and asked if she would live together with the farmer’s family. He was so sure he could convince the old farmer that Fluffy was a good lioness.

Fluffy replied that there was no chance the old farmer would believe nor accept her and Liam should never believe her either. To Liam’s horror she added, “It was true that I never ate your old man’s chickens, they are too tiny for me. But I’ve been starving for two days and I will eat you now.”

The old farmer caught the lioness red-handed as she was devouring the poor dog, and immediately shot her to death.

***

A tragic end for a naive dog and a fair karma for the unthankful lioness.

Is this too harsh for a children story?

** thanks to Adeel for helping me with the Lion's name :) **

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